Fool's Paradise

You can lead a horse to water

But you can’t make him drink

You can call me a big happy talker

But you have no idea how I think

You said it’s darkest before dawn

But that phrase will soon expire

All I see are clouds on the horizon

It’s out of the frying pan, into the fire

Now it’s that one special day

Where happiness is being spread

But for me, there’s nothing but grey

An endless spiral of dread

You say you want to see me heal

But you only talk about how you feel

You say you want to witness my clearance

But you only care about my appearance

You tell me I’m not doing well

You trap me in this empty cell

You cause sharp pains in my chest

Because I’m genuinely trying my best

But perfect as we all are

We are hiding behind this song

Perfect with not a single scar

Proves that I do not truly belong

These gifts I receive are not mine

I know they’re all saved for the queen

It’s always been your time to shine

On this perfectly set up scene

So stop counting down the days

Stop giving me all this praise

Because I wish not to be reminded

Of how badly you have been blinded

Now keep singing your little song

The same one I heard last year

Keep encouraging to sing along

As I make my wish to disappear

Restless Boy

He was tired.
He was so, so tired.

He hadn’t completed a single productive task, 
yet the demon of exhaustion clung to his shoulders.

Pathetic, weak, and selfish.

Three words that repeated in his head,

like a lame-winged bird refusing to give up.

He had always been a good pretender.
But he learned that the longer you keep things hidden,
the uglier they become.

He drags his heavy body towards something.

Home, probably.

He watches his breaths dispersing into the air,

like they were never even there.

He knows this familiar tightening in his chest.
But that doesn’t make it any less painful,
being reminded of how he wasn't enough
for the only one he craved.

Smiles are always temporary.
You can’t rely on someone else for happiness,
because the moment they leave,
they take it all with them.

He dwells in the sickness of those words he should’ve said,
when he still had the chance.

He gets through the night with twelve hours of sleep,
but he awakes more exhausted.

He claims to have overslept.
The classroom fills with laughter.

He had been crying,

battled with his thoughts,
considered never waking up.
Still, professor Harvey scolds him.

He's counting every second until he bursts.

Nobody sees it.

Nobody notices that he’s drowning. 
He could be bleeding to death in front of everyone,
yet they would still not know.

He’s selfish for wanting more from the life he’s living.

Lately, he can't even face himself in the mirror,
afraid to be greeted with the pure failure of a man
that had let someone destroy him beyond repair.

He hadn’t received a simple word.
No goodbye.
Just gone.

And he’s left thinking:
Ah, there it is.

The familiar shattering of a heart that knew better than to trust.

To love.

He knew all along.

Yet he let it get to him anyway.

And now he expects people to feel bad for him?

Oh, what a naive little boy.

Flower Pot

The void has successfully grown

The roses are turning much duller

The dog walks all alone

While holding its own blue collar

The dog starts digging at the dirt

Sniffing for a seed for hours

Now the dog is left feeling hurt

Because it can’t plant any more flowers

You have always been like this dog

You have always loved your little plants

But now your garden is filled with fog

It’s no longer a home for the ants

So I can tell you’ve made some room

To plant a green stem on your wrist

I know that soon the stem will bloom

And you will slowly cease to exist

Left in the pot is nothing but ash

Powder that most people consider trash

I watch the leaves connect with the ground

Wither peacefully, making no sound

I wished to join the dog for a walk

Find the beauty in flowers along its side

I know that we wouldn’t need to talk

Not with the leash that helps us collide

But the cold storm turned green to blue

And resulted in walks not lasting for long

I always knew it was too good to be true

Yet I wished you had just brought me along

You had way too easily kicked me out

Deciding to only focus on your sprout

You said the pot was where I had wronged

I thought with you was where I belonged

I was left feeling like a flower without sun

I didn’t know the dark had only just begun

Everyone around me wishes I was wiser

A bit wiser, to avoid using the fertilizer

Now the void won’t stop growing in size

Just like the sire who lost his beloved wife

The stem was erased by the edge of a knife

I just wish I had the ability to love it back to life